In All of Us; There live Two Wolves

“An indian was talking to his grandson.

He said: ‘In all humans there lives two wolves, who are fighting. One is evil –  He is anger, envy, sorry, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, calm, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.’

“Which wolf will win?” said the grandson.

“The one you feed” said the old man.”

Everything Will be OK in the End…

Don’t be Distracted by What You Read Online

During the last decade the web has grown dramatically and it seems every day there’s a new blog / lifestyle guru / social media evangelist telling us how to live our life, what to do, who to be, what not to be, etc etc.

It’s easy to be distracted from the reality and glamorize “these people” (no names given) that have spent massive amounts of time and energy building their own personal brand. The thing to understand is that everyone online is working on “that perfect article”, the post that get you most shares, new followers and lots of social media attention.

Bloggers spend time writing stories about how to be a successful blogger and writing opinions on varied matters while representing themselves as experts. But what’s important to keep in mind is that a lot of what you read online is often pure fiction; the author’s life story and their world view. The problem with the democratization of user generated content (UGC) or self-publishing online is that we’ve lost the editors who used to provide quality control.

Photo credit: Vicky Lam

Before I started writing, I followed some online writers and admired their work, I even wished to become like them one day, and religiously tried to emulate them. But what I’ve came to realize is that it’s all just background noise. You can be any thing you want to be. And it’s important to keep yourself focused on who You are and what You do well, and to not pay too much attention to what others are telling You about what You should be and how You should do it.

Most online guru’s spend their majority of time writing and creating a valuable online self-branding image. It’s not just about the picture, but about the style, what content they produce, their activity on social media channels. And I’ve often felt intimidated by women who produce great content, take the perfect pictures, are active on twitter / facebook / pinterest, and on top of it have their day job and appear as guest speaker on various seminars. Let me break the truth for you – most of those have assistants, have various partners, assistants, freelancers and helpers working with them growing their online appearance.

It’s easy to read what others are doing and thinking that you want to become like them, believing that they live a perfect life. Perhaps you can be like them, but most likely you can be even better.

Bottom line is; don’t get distracted by what you read online. Create yourself and build your own success!

 Be Confident and Striving – always move in your own Direction. And like Liv posted Create Yourself!

Repeat Until Happy

Repeat Until Happy

I read this great article today at Behavior Gap.

It talks about how there seems to be this constant battle between what we have, what we need and what we think we want, today. How we all, including our kids, have gotten in to the habit of always wanting something new and shiny – but then tossing it for something other new and shiny a few weeks later.

Apple is the perfect example of a company and products, which seem to always be out of style. I bought the iPhone 4 when it was fairly new, had time to just get used to it when there was a new iPhone on the market. And then, my iPhone is all of a sudden looked upon as if it had a cord and was attached to the wall.

One of the most challenging personal finance issues we all face is the ever-expanding definition of “need.” Things we once considered clear luxuries have somehow becomes necessities, often without any consideration of how the change in status happened.

To achieve clarity about the difference between our needs and wants is one of the hardest things today. One of the most discouraging parts of modern life seems to be this never-ending sense that we should want more. Why can we not just be content with what we have? Or feel the pleasure and pride in keeping something for a long time (let me tell you, I don’t find it easy to keep something fresh, nice looking and whole for a very long time.) So here are a few of things to think about:

  • What if financial happiness is not about getting more but about wanting less?
  • What if things start out as wants and become needs not because the thing itself has changed but because our feelings about it have changed?
  • What if you can never really get enough of something that you don’t need?
To keep the balance between wants and needs, in the article they tell us to “sleep on a decision overnight” – this might actually help. Another tip they give is to never buy anything online until it has been sitting in your cart for five days. I am not too sure about that one…

“You only Regret regret What You Don’t Do”

I can’t even count the times that I’ve heard: “You only Regret regret What You Don’t Do”
I find that statement to be passive, the quote in itself takes a defensive standpoint which is not very pro active towards life. The quote is not by any means inspirational, to me it comes across more like a threat: “Make sure you Do Something or You Will Regret it”

As far as I know we only get one shot at life, and we’re worrying about regretting how to live it!? Is it really that hard to listen to yourself and follow your own will? Or maybe we don’t even know what we want? So we have to make sure we have to do something… What something?

I read an article in the Guardian about an Australian nurse Bronnie Ware who’s over the last years have been treating patients who’s light soon would burn out. During that time she kept a record of their regrets in life:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

What is it that you wish for? What would you like to experience  in your life? Do you have the courage to go after it?